Dumplings.

Something that I wish I could do is use my hands for more than putting shit in a bowl then baking it and making it taste good. I'm not artsy. I watch all the cake and sugar piece showdowns on Food Network and I get so insanely jealous of their artistic abilities that it's almost borderline like someone fucked my boyfriend in front of me. It is THAT bad. I desperately crave to barter with the Devil and get artistic hands, ones that are able to execute when I see in my mind.

When I make dumplings, they are fucking ugly. Granted they're not as fucking terrible looking as Dani or Racheal's dumplings but they're still pretty ugly. At least they taste like they should taste and I'm happy with that but fuck man, they are atrocious. What I wouldn't do to have some tiny little Chinese lady that's like a fuckin' 100 come to my house and beat the beauty of dumplings out of me. I would almost pay for it.

Aside from my wet dreams of being beaten by an old Asian lady, today at Whole Foods I almost peed on myself when I discovered vinegars that I have never owned before. So I splurged a little and bought some additional vinegars besides the much, much, MUCH needed brown rice vinegar for my dumpling dipping sauce. Every day I'm slowly getting closer and closer to the dream of having an awesome collection of vinegar. Between my new secret Spanish market, Whole Foods and the mass amount of vinegars I brought back from Europe... I almost there.

For the record my loyal readers, I have been a very good girl on my diet. I ate two small dumplings and that was my entire dinner. I've been fruiting/vegging myself all day. I will only break my diet when foie gras is shoved in my face.